It goes like this: Addressing an audience is the top fear for the typical person, even outranking death. So, “if you have to attend a funeral, you’d rather be inside the casket than giving the eulogy.”
Put simply, fearing public speaking is absurd. Still, it stays at the top of many people’s lists.
Why is that?
“I think folks are generally afraid,” said Patrick McInnis, an improv artist and instructor based in Florida. “Communicating is scary, broadly speaking. Being genuine is frightening.”
When you’re standing in front of a crowd, everyone’s attention is on you. That can be brutal for self-esteem, explained David Abolafia, a stand-up comic and coaching coach.
“Throughout life, we’ve been told repeatedly that we can’t do something, shouldn’t try something, or aren’t good at something, and we internalize that,” said Abolafia. “It shapes our self-image so much that facing people to speak can feel overwhelming.”
Les McCurdy, a seasoned performer and teacher at the Humor Institute at McCurdy’s Comedy Theatre in Tampa, notes, “The dread of public embarrassment, I believe, is stronger for many people than the fear of bodily harm.”
Given the option between being shamed in front of a crowd or taking a hit, McCurdy believes “most folks would choose the punches.”
How to Beat Your Fear of Public Speaking
I spoke with these performers to discover how they conquer nerves and take the stage night after night. Here’s the advice they give newcomers preparing to try stand-up or improv for the first time.
1. Exude Confidence
One of the top tips for public speaking is one you probably don’t want to hear: Believe in yourself. Sorry — it’s worth repeating.
I get it — simply being told to be confident won’t magically make you so. You need to be ready and convinced whatever you plan to present is sufficient.
“Trust that what brought you here is already adequate, and you’ll be fine,” McInnis said.
That means if you blank on a line, don’t get the laugh you wanted, or stumble to the podium, cut yourself some slack. It means that if you’re an intern pitching an idea to executives, recognize you’re capable.
Your poise and ease improve the delivery.
“If you’re enjoying yourself, the crowd will too,” said McCurdy. “If you clamp down and get insecure, it’s visible, and the audience will pick up on that — and that’s not helpful.”
2. Understand Your Audience
“Listening is the biggest thing I teach,” McInnis said.
In improv, this means tuning into your scene partner so you can respond. In public speaking, it means being attuned to what your listeners need.
Some of that “listening” happens in the moment as you read the audience’s reactions. Mostly, though, it should happen beforehand.
“A skilled speaker tailors their remarks to what people want to hear,” McInnis said. “If you’ve heard their struggles, you’ve created the right talking points. If you start from what you think matters, you probably won’t be addressing the audience on their terms.”
Before you take the stage, know who they are. Are they college kids or colleagues? Do they want career guidance or simply tips on using Gmail?
Shape your talk and tone to fit their objectives.
3. Speak as If to One Person
Many commentators laud what makes Bill Clinton such an effective orator. A frequent observation is he makes you feel like he’s addressing you — even among thousands.
He’s not literally staring at you the whole time. The secret, McInnis notes, is to “prepare as though you’re communicating this to a single individual.”
Compose your remarks as if you’re having a one-on-one conversation, not performing for a multitude.
That approach should relax you and make the audience feel more at ease.
4. Don’t Overload Your Message
Part of self-assurance is trusting your content. McInnis explains:
“Less experienced improvisers or those struggling … fear they haven’t said enough or weren’t funny enough, so they’ll make moves like talking over a partner or dominating a scene… because they worry what they’ve done isn’t sufficient.”
That’s a trap I fall into during presentations often — maybe you do too?
Worried the audience won’t grasp a point, we keep piling on explanations — usually off-script. It’s usually unnecessary.
Rely on your preparation. If you know your audience and what they need, that should suffice. Over-explaining is likelier to lose them than win them over.
5. Slow Your Pace
“When people step up, they often race through their words,” Abolafia said.
With adrenaline pumping, you want to finish quickly. But if you speak too rapidly, your audience can’t absorb and interpret what you’re saying.
When drafting your talk, insert pauses and breathing points. They allow you to relax and give listeners time to process your points.
6. Keep Your Central Point in Mind
My biggest dread when addressing a crowd? Freezing mid-sentence.
If you don’t have a prompt or notes to guide you, what do you do when your mind goes blank in front of everyone?
McInnis recommends, “Return to your starting point.”
In other words, remember the promise you made to the audience at the outset.
“In any show, film, play — and any improv scene or speech — there’s a promise up front,” he said. “We indicate what we’ll discuss, what our character believes, or what roles we play in relationships. … If you ever lose your place, returning to the original point should bring you back on track.”
This echoes a core rule of speechwriting: Tell the audience what you’ll cover, cover it, then recap what you covered.
Maintain that focused objective. If you blank on the next line, revert to the presentation’s purpose. Ask yourself what more you can say to fulfill that goal.
It might jog your memory. If not, it will at least keep the presentation moving. The audience doesn’t know your planned script anyway.
7. Care About Your Topic
“You must commit and bring 100% of your energy to the performance,” McCurdy said. “If you hold back, you never give it a real chance.”
Phoning it in shows. Audiences usually sense when you’re not fully invested.
When you step on stage, stand behind a lectern, or rise in a conference room — invest your words, posture, and enthusiasm fully in what you’re saying.
That’s far easier when the material matters to you.
“Anyone can get up and tell a joke, but unless it resonates with you, the crowd won’t value it as much as you want,” Abolafia said about doing stand-up.
“If you’re engaged with the content … highlight that, so people see and value your passion for the subject.”
8. Interact With the Audience
Finally, if you’re confident, passionate, and attuned to your audience, show it by interacting with them.
You may not take suggestions like an improv player or handle hecklers like a comic. Still, comedy training (or at least thinking like an improviser or stand-up) can make you more natural and comfortable on stage.
“Sometimes you need to step away from what you prepared and respond to what’s happening,” Abolafia said.
You can pose questions or simply acknowledge audience reactions — it’s up to you. There aren’t hard-and-fast engagement rules for public speaking.
But treating it like a conversation helps.
Your listeners might not reply aloud, but they’ll react — laugh, clap, scoff, shift in their seats, or nod. Engagement means adjusting to those cues.
Cut the scripted line that says, “You know what I’m talking about!” if people are shaking their heads in confusion.
Pause and breathe if the room becomes emotional. Let them experience it.
And allow laughter — even if it comes unexpectedly. It’s usually positive, so don’t try to speak over it.
“If you step on laughter,” Abolafia said, “people will stop because they want to hear more.”
Your Turn: Do you fear public speaking? How do you handle it?
Dana Sitar (@danasitar) is a senior writer at Savinly. She’s penned work for Huffington Post, Entrepreneur.com, Writer’s Digest and others, sneaking in humor wherever possible (and sometimes where it’s not).
