Four days after undergoing gender-affirming surgery, Kyle Hollingsworth could barely stop grinning as he waited to glimpse his new chest in Dr. Charles Garramone’s waiting area in Davie, Florida. The operation removed his breast tissue and sculpted a male-contoured chest that, together with his emerging facial hair, aligned with how he felt inside.
On the morning of his reveal, Kyle and his mother, Sandra Mathis, joked and snapped selfies in the waiting room. They traded phones to test which camera offered the best angle and lighting (his mom’s won).
As Kyle peered into the mirror with Dr. Garramone nearby, his voice rose with joy.
“I am physically the person I always knew I was,” he said.
Kyle got inventive about funding the procedure. He collected $3,695 through GoFundMe, a crowdfunding site. In August 2017 he moved in with friends rent-free, which enabled him to stash away another $2,500 in three months.
He tapped $1,625 from his retirement account to cover the surgery center fee.
“Honestly, I didn’t even think about the debt,” Kyle admitted. “All I cared about was the operation. Technically I’m in debt, but it’s debt to myself because it’s my retirement.”
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The night of his surgery, the sky was still dark, but Kyle, his mom and his aunt, Terry Thomas, traded jokes as they drove to the clinic.
“I’m going to be so attractive,” Kyle laughed.
“I’m just ready to do this,” he said while being prepped for the operation.
“I want my mommy,” Kyle whimpered as the IV was started.
His mother kissed his forehead before he was wheeled into the operating room; she was there when he came out of anesthesia.
At home she put compression socks on his feet, tied his hair into a ponytail because he couldn’t raise his arms, and fixed his breakfast.
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The day after surgery, Kyle lounged in a recliner, drifting in and out of sleep while watching “The Great British Bake Off” on Netflix. There were frequent bursts of laughter.
“When I look down and I don’t see boobs, it was just this feeling I can’t even put into words,” Kyle said. “It felt amazing. The physical pain is absolutely worth it to no longer feel the emotional pain.”
Kyle’s immediate priorities aren’t centered solely on his transition. He’s focused on eliminating $10,000 in credit card balances.
“I’ll have the first card paid off by August, and then the rest will be gone within the year,” Kyle said. “By August 2019, I should be free of credit card debt.”
His surgery also taught him financial discipline. He used to spend money the moment it arrived and occasionally took out payday loans to cover wants.
“I was like, there has to be a better way to live,” he said. “I earn way too much to be living paycheck to paycheck.”
He calculated his income and determined what he needed for rent, utilities, food and essentials. Then he began dividing the remainder into separate bank accounts: one for discretionary spending, one for bills and one designated for his surgery expenses.
Kyle found surprising support on social platforms after he changed his name on Facebook.
“It was an overwhelming wave of support I didn’t know I had,” he said.
He began uploading videos that documented his transition progress — from starting hormones to the days leading up to surgery, the operation itself and his recovery.
“That really helped me stay candid about my transition,” he said.
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When Kyle came out as transgender, he confided in his ex-wife and close friends first. “The most nerve-wracking part was telling my family,” he said.
He told his mother first, then shared the news with his extended relatives.
Throughout his transition, he noticed his mother adopted a refreshed perspective on life.
“She’s kind of this you-do-you person now, which is really great,” he said. “I appreciate my mom’s new outlook.”
Not everyone in his family has embraced that perspective yet, but Kyle remains optimistic they’ll adjust in time.
When people use “she” instead of “he,” Kyle finds it hard to simply laugh it off.
“It’s a worse hurt than what I’m feeling physically right now,” he said, referring to his surgical pain. “It makes you feel unreal. Invisible. Invalid. And it stings. Why would you want to hurt me? I don’t want to hurt you.”
His young cousin, Teriana Horn, 3, uses Kyle’s name and correct pronouns naturally. She even corrects others when they slip up — it’s almost reflexive for her.
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Two months after surgery, Kyle returned to his rented room in Orlando. In March 2018 he moved back to South Florida.
“There was nothing left for me in Orlando,” Kyle said. “I was divorced. I lost my job. I have no family up there. There was nothing keeping me there. I wanted to come home, be near my family and save money.”
After returning home, Kyle moved in with his aunt. Living rent-free will speed up his credit card payoff. His new position also pays $6,000 more annually than his former job.
“The universe has conspired to help me get out of debt,” he said. “This year my goal is to save half of my extra income and put it toward debt. By year’s end I’ll have less debt and more savings.”
If you’re curious about the costs associated with gender-affirming procedures and planning for them, check out resources on gender transition financial costs for practical guidance and budgeting tips.
