Before I launched my profitable new vocation, making ends meet wasn’t always simple for me.
Raised in a developing nation, opportunities often seemed scarce.
I wanted to obtain a solid college education, but that was beyond my means. I applied for positions across different sectors, but like many young people today, securing full-time employment proved difficult.
Even when I landed an entry-level job, employers often refused to pay me enough to cover my expenses.
I felt trapped. Progress was elusive. My career direction was uncertain, and I grew increasingly exasperated.
Everything shifted, though, when I ventured into an exciting, well-compensated career in inbound email marketing.
I’ll be frank. It wasn’t a breeze. I wasn’t an instant triumph in my new line of work. It required practice and discipline to learn how to shape my messages to attract my intended audience.
Through much trial and error, I improved at writing attention-grabbing email subject lines such as:
“Urgent Business Proposition For You — Confidentiality Requested”
Or:
“Your Assistance Needed With Confidential Transfer of Funds”
Or:
“Absolute Secrecy Required in Transfer of ($25,000,000) Twenty Five Million Dollars”
Or:
“From the Office of Prince Jonathan Agogdedwenge of Nigeria”
How to Reach Your Audience
You see, a memorable subject line is necessary to capture the attention of my targets… I mean, my prospective clients.
Once they open my message, it typically reads something like this:
Dear Most Valued and Esteemed Friend,
This communication is of an urgent and private nature.
With a warm heart I extend my friendship and greetings, and I hope this letter finds you well. It will be surprising for you to receive this proposal from me since you do not know me personally. Nevertheless, I am earnestly seeking your trust in this transaction, which I propose from a candid heart and as a person of honor.
I am Prince Kufour Otumfuo of Nigeria, the firstborn son of the late King Otumfuo Opoku II, who passed away after a brief illness. Prior to my father’s demise, I was designated and publicly recognized as the next successor and beneficiary of my father’s estate according to African traditional custom.
My father left an enormous fortune of 1,304,976,551 ZAR ($163.63 Million USD). Regrettably, due to certain regulations of the Nigerian Government, I cannot claim the funds myself because the Government will soon appropriate the estate.
I request your assistance as a non-Nigerian citizen to transfer the funds out of Nigeria. If the money can be moved into your name, into your United States account, I will consent to allow you to keep 25 percent of the sum ($41 Million USD) as compensation for your considerable help.
However, initially I will require you to send me $5,000 so that specific officials at the Central Bank of Nigeria can be bribed to release the $163.63 Million USD to you.
Please contact me at your earliest convenience. Time is critical in this matter; shortly the Nigerian Government will discover that the Central Bank is holding this amount on deposit, and will attempt to seize it through certain taxes and levies.
May the Lord bless you and your household.
Best Regards,
Prince Kufour Otumfuo
Challenges in My Industry
Oh sure, I can guess what you’re thinking. You’re probably like the authorities, using harsh, crude labels for my trade, like “scam” or “fraud” or “con artist.”
Look, it’s not effortless operating this enterprise out of an internet cafe here in Lagos, Nigeria. I’ve had to elevate my skills.
These days, merely forging documents with official-looking Nigerian stamps and seals isn’t enough. No, I must fabricate credible websites too. I even attended one of those coding classes you see advertised at the Apple Store.
I have to keep buying new disposable phones.
I must compete with people claiming to be U.S. soldiers who discovered a hidden stash of gold in Iraq.
Despite these hurdles, I’ll say that inbound email marketing as a Nigerian prince is a lively and dynamic profession.
If you’d like more information, please drop me a note. I have a business proposition for you. It’s private and demands total confidentiality.
Our legal team would like to remind you that it’s April 1.
Your Turn: I am a Nigerian prince. Will you send me money?
Mark Randall ([email protected]) is a senior writer at Savinly. He is a Nigerian prince. Will you send him money?
