I’m 20, a full-time college student and newly married — we tied the knot less than two months ago. My husband will begin full-time classes this fall too.
I deal with multiple health issues and recently had to postpone surgery because my husband suffered an accident and won’t be able to work for four to five weeks. We’re surviving on my income alone and are barely covering essentials. My doctor advised I cut back my hours, but we simply can’t afford that right now.
We don’t want to declare bankruptcy, and we’re trying to avoid enrolling in government programs. Any guidance for a couple stumbling out of the gate?
S.
Dear S.,
Married life is an adjustment. Being newly married and young adds extra layers of complexity.
I got married three weeks into my first semester of college. Shortly after, I wandered back into my old high school feeling oddly grown-up. Look at me: I’m married and in charge now. I popped in to see my favorite biology teacher and when he asked how things were going, I joked that we were broke.
He stopped grading papers and looked me in the eye. “Money’s going to be tight for a while,” he said. He shared a few memories of starting out with his wife when their children were small. He didn’t criticize my age or question why I’d married so young. He simply laid out how difficult it can be to make ends meet at the beginning of married life.
So if everything seems overwhelming at the moment, that’s understandable — it probably is difficult right now. Many of us leave home without being fully prepared to manage all aspects of adult life. Then add another newly independent adult in the same household and tensions are bound to arise.
Filing for bankruptcy at 20 is likely not a practical route. But accepting government aid could be a meaningful short-term solution while you navigate health challenges and financial pressure.
For example, you might qualify for SNAP, the program previously called food stamps. It’s intended for working adults with limited resources. In many states you can apply for SNAP online, so you don’t have to make a potentially uncomfortable phone call or in-person visit to get assistance.
Another option is reducing your course load to part-time. Most schools allow you to keep certain types of financial aid if you maintain at least six credits per term, though policies differ by institution. Slowing down your degree progress for a semester or two could relieve stress while you and your husband sort out work schedules and medical care.
Reaching out for help is difficult, but doing so now can build a firmer foundation later. This isn’t the moment to hide money worries from family, friends, or — most importantly — each other.
If you don’t share your concerns, they’ll corrode your relationship bit by bit.
Also consider reading resources like dear penny renting a house, dear penny helping parents financially and how to save money when youre broke for practical tips and perspective.
Anna Mercer is a senior writer at Savinly.
