I’m really thrilled about the rental I just moved into, but my mom keeps making snide remarks about my choice to rent. She constantly scrolls through Zillow and insists my mortgage would be much cheaper than my rent. I’ve pointed out multiple times that Zillow’s figures typically assume a 20% down payment (which I don’t have) and don’t account for things like property taxes or insurance.
But I’m not trying to start a renting-vs-buying feud. I just want a good reply for homeowners who feel obliged to lecture renters about how foolish their financial decisions are. Why do so many people think it’s OK to critique others’ money choices?
Sincerely,
Content Renter
Dear Content Renter,
You can’t always rely on homeowners’ recollections of buying a house.
Many homeowners love to tell me — a fellow content renter — how low their monthly mortgage payment is compared with my rent. They’re quick to brag about the equity they’re building the longer they own their place. But they seldom mention the size of their down payment, closing fees, homeowners association costs, property taxes, or how much the new dishwasher cost last summer.
Owning a home isn’t the automatic sign of adulthood it once was. A 2018 study by the Federal Reserve Bank of New York showed that nearly half of people surveyed said they don’t earn enough to even begin looking for a house. A similar share said they have too much debt or insufficient savings to consider purchasing.
If you want more data to back you up, last year Bloomberg reported that renters outnumber owners in 52 of the 100 largest U.S. cities.
Beyond broad economic pressures like stagnant wages and overwhelming student loan loads, the choice to rent is often a personal one. Renting grants flexibility for people bitten by wanderlust or expecting frequent job moves. It can be a trial run for couples who want to be certain they can live together without killing the romance. It can also bring comfort knowing monthly costs are fairly predictable — and that you won’t be the one fixing the dishwasher.
Chances are you’re already aware of those points. What you really need to repel homeowners’ lectures is a short, go-to line to use whenever someone starts in on you.
Here’s a straightforward one I recommend:
“Renting is the best choice for me right now.”
Say it out loud. Say it firmly. Say it even if deep down your ideal is to own someday, but your finances say otherwise. You don’t owe anyone an explanation (not even your mom). There’s no requirement to fire back with sass. Simply repeat your mantra calmly and confidently, perhaps with a smile.
If you’d like to read more about managing living costs on a tight budget, check out resources on renting on minimum wage.
Have a prickly money question? Send it to Dear Penny at https://savinly.com/dear-penny/
Amy Jordan is a personal finance writer and senior contributor at Savinly, and the columnist behind Dear Penny. For more hands-on money advice, visit www.savinly.com.
